Surrendering to Life's Path

Think about it... we're brought into a world where we have to face the unknown daily, and we hate it...

We don't like not knowing the outcome. We don't like not knowing what we are going to experience in the day ahead. And it takes a lot of practice, mindfulness, and becoming self-aware in learning how to break free from that habit and that mindset.

Anxiety is an overwhelming emotion that sometimes cannot be stopped; However, if you learn to cope, nurture, and move forward without allowing it to dictate your fears of the unknown and the way you live your day to day life, you can truly find peace within, and stop worrying about the next bill you have to pay, how you're going to afford groceries, the outcome of your current relationship, or where you'll be a year from now.

Truth is, we don't know. We'll never know, and if this year taught us anything, you cannot plan every waking moment of your life, or worry about it for that matter. So instead, we're going to work on being present, and focus on the NOW.

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We can start by doing these few things:

Be realistic about the things you CANNOT control.

For starters, what you CANNOT control -- things like the weather, a pandemic, getting into a car accident, etc. Those are things you absolutely cannot control. I know this year has been stressful and brought a lot of chaotic, negative energy. A lot of people have felt overwhelmed due to financial stress and losing their jobs due to the pandemic, but there was nothing you could have said or done that would have prevented that from happening.

You need to come into a state of understanding that there are certain things you cannot control within this world, and when we do try to control things, chances are they repel even further away from you.

The more you try to control the outcome, the more overwhelming and anxious the situation becomes, as well as the more toxic the situation becomes. You'll start living in the future to the point where your entire present slips away from you.

Exercise: Take out a piece of paper or your journal, and list out everything in your life that you have absolutely no control over. Feel free to burn this list as a means of a full release or hang it somewhere to serve as a reminder for the next time you're worrying over something you cannot control.

Make a list about the things you can control.

The things you CAN control are things like your health, your mental well-being, the thoughts you feed to yourself everyday, the choices, and the actions you make in your day to day life.

It sounds cheesy, but you have the option to choose your perspective and the way you view yourself and the world around you. Same with your mental and physical health -- you have the ability to either take the necessary steps in nurturing your mentality through positive media and affirmations, or choose to constantly be in a state of victimizing yourself and participate in negative self talk. You also have the choice as to what foods and energy you put into and allow to be passed through your body.

This isn't to say you cannot feel your negative emotions when they come up, but feeling them, validating them, then releasing them, while also understanding how to nurture and guide them, and learn more about yourself. This also is not to say what you should be doing or how you SHOULD be spending your days, this is simply to show you that you have complete control of your mindset, your mentality, your physical well-being, as well as your emotional well-being.

Exercise: Make a list of everything in your life that you CAN control within your own life, and if you feel like you don't have control over it, but are capable of doing so, write out how you can take BACK control over this situation, whether it's your mental or physical health, your financials, etc.

Journal out your emotions associated with your fears + emotions .

A lot of emotions come with desire to control the outcome. A lot of fear, a lot of worry, a lot of anxious attachment styles, and constantly being in your head day in and day out thinking about it.

One of the best tools I have used in any case scenario is journaling. It's a safe space to express, feel, and free yourself of the overwhelming emotions.

Exercise: Take out your journal. Whether you believe in God, the Universe, a higher power... whatever the case may be, open to a page and your journal and write a letter addressing them. Write what you want to control and why it's so important to you. Write why you're so focused in on it. Write out why you feel like you have to have this object or this job or financial gain in order to be in a happier place. Release any fears, doubts, and troubles you have facing this situation, and why you're so afraid it might now work out. Let your heart guide you.

Practice meditation + yoga.

It isn't everyone's cup of tea, at least the idea of it, especially meditation, but trust me on this one. Using meditation + yoga allows you to release tension, focus on your breathing, and focus on the present moment at hand.

The cool part about meditation is that it can literally be anything. You don't have to sit in and focus on a guided meditation, though I suggest you start off by doing that, but meditation can technically be any activity that you are primarily focused on in that present moment, and are ACTUALLY present during, without your mind wandering.

Exercise: For yoga beginners, I suggest using "SarahBethYoga" or "Yoga with Adriana" on YouTube. For meditation, there are guided meditations on spotify + youtube. When I first started out, I kinda browsed and found which ones I liked and felt more guided toward me, so I'll leave it up to your own self-exploration for that one. Take 10-20 minutes out of your day. Try to do this every single day where you just sit with yourself. Meditate or do yoga, or do both (that's what I do), and find the release. Release your worries, your tension, and just focus on breathing and everyone you are experiencing right at that very moment.

Daily practice of affirmations + becoming more self-aware.

Saying daily affirmations and becoming more mindful, more self-aware, and more present can help battle the voice within your head trying to gain control.

There are multiple times a day where my brain speaks out of turn telling me I should worry about my next bill, my future relationships, my future plan... but it's become my job to be the other voice within my head...

Daily affirmations such as:

- All is well

- I trust where I'm being led

- I am being divinely guided and supported

- I am protected

- What's meant for me will not pass me

Saying those constantly, several times throughout the day, has a huge affect on the subconscious mind. Our subconscious actually cannot tell the difference between what's real and what isn't... so the more you feed it with thoughts of: "I could never do that..." "How am I going to afford that..." "This bill is overdue..." You're coming from a place of lack mindset and in doing so, teaching your subconscious mind and that little voice in your head to be like "yeah, you're right, I'm totally poor and worthless..."

But the more you fuel your subconscious mind with positive affirmations, you are teaching it that you are abundant and you are well, and thus, you start to attract more of what you vibrate and truly believe.

Positive affirmations are a daily practice that need to be implemented into your daily routine, and through doing this, you start to become more aware of the thoughts that do infiltrate your brain. You'll start recognizing when that other voice comes in and starts talking or thinking negatively about yourself and your life, and you'll learn how to GAIN CONTROL over that aspect, and before you know it, you'll be able to switch your mindset within an instant.

Exercise: Every morning when you get up, grab a journal, and first start with writing about any negative emotions, doubts, or feelings you have in order to express and release them, so you can feel the weight fall off your shoulders. Next, take a look at what you're grateful for. You can either do the grand scheme of things or personally, I like to write out what has happened or what have I experienced in the last 24 hours that truly made me feel grateful and blessed to be alive. Don't just aimlessly write, but truly feel the emotion of gratitude fill you up. This is also a practice to be more mindful and aware of what has happened in the last day and everything you currently have -- if you are struggling, then it might be because you allowed your mind to wander, where it was focused on the past or the future. After your list of gratitude, write out 5-10 'I AM' affirmations as well as ones similar to the one above. After writing these out, I want you to look in the mirror and repeat this list out loud to yourself three times. (And honestly, try to repeat it throughout your day wherever you see fit).

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Truth is, we cannot control every little thing within our lives.

We cannot control relationships.

We cannot control other people's actions toward us.

We cannot control the economy or the job market.

We cannot control other people's feelings.

We cannot control the past.

We cannot control the future.

We cannot control the outcome.

What's meant to be will always be, and learning how to become more mindful and present within your day to day life can help limit that voice that signals you to worry about events that haven't even happened yet.

If there is one thing I've learned, it's to let go. What flows will flow, and what comes will come. Don't hold onto relationships. Hold onto jobs and money. Hold onto things, chase things, cling to things... because the things you have to chase in life are the things that don't want to be caught. They are the things that are not meant for you, and that isn't a "no" from God or the Universe. It's just simply: "not yet" or "I have something better for you."

Trying to control a situation limits other possibilities to flow toward you, so using these exercises and tools to help you become more mindful, more present, and more grateful for everything you have in your life at this CURRENT moment will unleash a potential you didn't even know you could reach.